Once a month, our very own Mad Madame Xenia looks deep into the future and tells you sad sacks whatâ€™s what.Â Just like that lady on TV with the fake Jamaican accent, but with more bitterness and gin.
November 23 â€“ December 21
Itâ€™s All about You
Happy Belated Birthday, sweetie! I would have written sooner but you donâ€™t make it too easy for Mdme, hmm? Always running this way and thatâ€¦ No time for anyone but yourself. Quite frankly, I had no idea where you were.
I sound like your wife, donâ€™t I?
No harm meant. (Isnâ€™t that how you put it after you made the waitress cry? â€œNo harm meantâ€? You just thought sheâ€™d feel better if she lost some weight. I understand.)
That lust for freedom and thirst for change â€“ itâ€™s all part of your transient appeal. Apologies! I donâ€™t know whatâ€™s gotten in to me tonight. I guess Iâ€™m just direct. Hmm?
But back to you! You are a sign thatâ€™s in and of the moment, living for the present, no thought of the future. Weâ€™d be jealous if yâ€™all werenâ€™t such a wreck. The energy and enthusiasm you bring to life spells hard core drug abuse and sexual mischief. (No wonder youâ€™re the most positive sign in the zodiac!)
Oh, donâ€™t worry. I wonâ€™t tell.
Itâ€™s in the Stars
I wonâ€™t tell because they already know. Look for an intervention mid month.
Unless she leaves you first, in which case youâ€™d have that night free.
A spontaneous road trip will end.
Karma is coming, and she is pissed.