Letters to the Editor

Ruth “Rooster” Flanagan here, reporting for duty once again, covering our Hobo Pancakes correspondence and putting out the word from the bird—that’s me!

 

Waiting to hear from you

I am Mr. Kazuhiko Okuda (Head of Internal Audit Group, Deputy President, Executive Officer and Director of Mizuho Trust & Banking Co., Ltd), Japan. I have a lucrative business proposal of mutual interest to share with you; it involves the transfer of a large sum of money from my bank here in Japan. I got your reference in my search for someone who suits my proposed business relationship in your country`s Chamber of Commerce. If you are interested in working with me, contact me through my private email; ( kazuhokuda@aol.jp ) for further details.

Kind Regards,
Mr. Kazuhiko Okuda.

Hiko, you salty old dog! You don’t have to resort to bush-league tactics to remind me of the brief flirtation we shared when you were busting rocks as a POW during the Second Great War.  You rattled your tin cup against the bars of your cage in an attempt to ruffle the Rooster.  I looked deep into your fathead enemy’s eyes and gave you a quick punch in the nethers—not for myself, you see, but for FDR, who had just died and I was taking it personal.  Anyroad, I’m not interested in your pyramid scheme—I haven’t used a bank since the Great Depression.  If you want to transfer cash to underneath my mattress and promote yourself to active duty, we can chew the fat—my scuzzball husband Pete died years ago.  Just email me at hobo.pancakes@gmail.com.

Potentially yours,

“Rooster”

Interested in you.

I’m Miss Anna  Tsunmc, i slim in stature above all i like being honesty,trusted, sincere. I have gone through your contact mail today, it interest me to know you more, and I hope to use this opportunity to explain myself a little about me, i am yellow in completion, I wish you to write me through id ( annatsunmc@gmail.com ). also i will send you my picture and also i have very important thing to tell you Anna.

 

Anna, what’s eating you?  Being honesty? Yellow in completion?  You seem like a real spaz, and I’d split on this email except I’m all ears to hear this important thing.  If you wanna slip me the info, just write me an email at hobo.pancakes@gmail.com.

Curiously yours,

R. “R.” F.

 

BLACKBERRY PROMOTION
Congratulations!!Your email I.D was selected , you have won the sum of one million Pounds Sterling from Blackberry Mobile Online United Kingdom 2013 promotion. Contact the Agent email below for further instructions. Email:
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, Tel: +447024041059

Thank you.

Sincerely,
SIR Alan Conwell
Blackberry zonal coordinator .

 

Dear SIR,

Let’s please not be ridiculous. No one uses Blackberry anymore, not even Estelle, the secretary at the Senior Diversion Center.  How could Blackberry smoke out one million pounds to give little old Rooster? Not that I couldn’t use the dough—I’ve been hoping to get new dentures soon.  If you can help get me new chompers, just email me at hobo.pancakes@gmail.com

Skeptically,

R. “R.” Flanagan

 

PS—Since when does the Queen knight people in ALL CAPITAL LETTERS? My granddaughter told me that’s a real trip for biscuits nowadays.

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